Jesus Alvarez

jeMy name is Jesus Alvarez. I’m Mexican-American and I’m 37 years young. I was born in Salem, Oregon, on December 24th, in 1980.

I’ve always been an entertainer my whole life, I just didn’t realize it on a professional level until I came to prison. Prison gave me the discipline and structure I needed, when I finally found out what my passion was.

As an entertainer I learned that stand-up comedy was my passion and also my outlet. Since I was a kid, I’ve always loved making people laugh. What makes me a unique comedian separated from other comedians is, I’m a multi-talented convict comedian who can act, sing, rap, and breakdance. My passion for comedy and all of my talents are original.

In prison you can’t fake being an entertainer. You either got it, or you don’t. Inmates here at the Oregon State Penitentiary are straightforward and will not hesitate to tell you, “You suck!” So when inmates kept asking me for more comedy shows, I knew I had something special. Implementing my singing, rapping, acting, and breakdancing into my comedy only made my stand-up 10 times better with an explosive punch, and ever since then, I’ve been addicted to my work. Everything was perfect except just one small problem, my writing skills awful yet horrible.

Since I’ve been a problem solver my whole life, I immediately registered myself into a writing course and took an acting class for shits and giggles. Long story short, it definitely paid off.

Although in writing I’m always learning something new, and I’m definitely improving. Also, at this very moment I’m writing my autobiography comedy book called “Que Loco!” (“How Crazy!”) My dream is to work with Tyler Perry. I’m also writing a poetry book followed by a cookbook, along with all my secret recipes. All three books will evolve and describe my crazy ass lifestyle.

With only one year left out of my six year sentence for failures to perform the duties of a driver, been writing consistently day and night. I’m so excited and can’t wait to share my funny ass story with the world.

Last but not least I would like to share something my writing professor told me one day. She said, “Writing can change your life.” And you know what? She was right! It’s already changing my life, and this is only the beginning.

All in all I just want to say: “Watch out America because I’m coming!”


Articles by Jesus Alvarez

Monday August 6

The Bucket

“Nine by six cell and small as hell. Not big. I can barely do the James Brown in here, I can bang my head against four walls in four seconds.”